Everyone gets offended. Lately it seems like it happens at every turn. I am offended. This offends me.I remember when I was younger, I had issues with self-control stemming from my AdHd, and I had difficulty relating to others. I found myself often blurting out things and my words would offend others and resulted in many awkward moments. I had great difficulty making real friends, and some things I said were held against me. Two stories I remember not-so-fondly from my childhood include my encounter with an overweight nurse while getting burn treatment for my arm, and an episode with a relative regarding cigarette smoking. Some of my words never were forgotten or forgiven, despite my lack of understanding the issue with them.
Over the years, I have learned more about self-control. I have made many changes and formed many habits to help with my AdHd. Though I still have some struggles with relating with others, I certainly have improved. Yet, I look around and I see that so many people still are getting offended—but it is much worse. The sad truth is the result of the offensive words and deeds. People hold it against others. People take something someone said and misinterpret it, and forever the person is disliked. Forgiveness is far from being found.
Yet as we think about the truth of the forgiveness of God, and we think about how people cling to anger and bitterness, we are found in contempt. We have offended God. Again and again, we have offended God. We will continue to offend God. Even so, He forgives us completely. He never holds it against us for our ignorance. He never lets our selfishness or lack of control taint His love for us. He does not tell us we are no longer welcome and out of His social group. He does not let the offense cause a break in the relationship—instead, God fills the gap with His love and grace. Today, consider what offenses you may be clinging to, and who needs your forgiveness. You may find that you need to forgive even more than the other person needs your forgiveness.
“For no matter how hard they try, God finds no pleasure with those who are controlled by the flesh.” – Romans 8:8 [TPT]
“Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” – Colossians 3:13 [NLT]
The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant can teach us all a great lesson about forgiveness. This lesson is geared toward elementary school children. The goal is to teach the children more about the topics of mercy and forgiveness and to encourage children to forgive and show mercy to others. The front page of this lesson provides a definition of mercy, a key verse, and breaks down God’s forgiveness. The second page is a fill-in sheet to be used with a discussion after reading Matthew 18:21-35 with the group. The activity/craft period of this lesson will be used to brainstorm how we can be better at forgiving. We will then make an art project or card for someone who we want to bless, someone who we may need to forgive for something or someone who we have forgiven in the past.
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Today when I was walking my dog, he was charged by another dog. I was prepared for the situation; however, because the same dog owner allowed this to happen weeks ago. Last time, he had let his Golden Retriever run loose and the dog came and snapped at my dog. This time, he left his German Shepherd loose, and although there was no snapping, I was not a happy camper at the second episode of negligence.
In life we will meet a person who will do something that irritates us, that hurts us or something that is wrong. We will throw our hands in the air (or sometimes our fists) and demand change. We will get angry. We will say words (sometimes words that are not positive, life speaking words). We will be frustrated by these people who do not do what we want them to do; however, we cannot expect them to change and act as we wish. Nor can we expect someone to follow the commands of God.
I was mad at this man today. He has proven twice that he cannot handle his dogs. The first time I was upset. I was injured. My dog was frightened. It was not a good situation. This second time, though prepared for it, was just as bad. Even so, some people will not change. We can only control our reactions to a situation—not someone else. It is how you react to any given situation that says something about you. I know I do not always react as I should, but I also know that over the years, the Holy Spirit has helped me to react better to each given situation. Don’t let situations and circumstances control you. React with love.
“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.” Colossians 3:12-14 [NLT]
When my kids were smaller they enjoyed playing with sidewalk chalk, drawing their own special creations. We would spend hours outlining our hands, capturing the image of a dog, and writing names. The chalk images and text would stay there for a few days, getting lighter as the time passed by. Sometimes the rain would come and our entire day’s work was gone in an instant, almost like we were never there at all.
The real issue is that although the chalk wipes away, the image is still imprinted in our minds. I can still see some of our sketches. I can picture the smiles on their faces. I can smell the air and even feel the sun beating down upon us. I can hear their laughter. All I need to do is “see” that image in my mind and it all comes back to me like I am there right at this moment.
To me, the purpose of the chalk is that it is making a mark on something. The kids are fascinated about making marks on the pavement. They are leaving their own little imprints. As some get older, they may even make their little marks with graffiti as well. What it all comes down to is leaving a mark.
A mark isn’t simply something that is engraved into a wooden park bench that says “Brian loves Sally.” A mark isn’t merely black spray paint letting it be known that “Tommy was here” at the bridge underpass. A mark may not even be the scribble a toddler leaves on a parent’s refrigerator. I am not talking about those marks at all.
I am talking about meaning. I am talking about purpose. I am talking about something that will be left behind showing that you did something good and you left a mark in someone’s life. A mark is when you touch someone’s life and they are forever changed for the better.
This past weekend I attended a memorial for a dear brother in Christ. He left so many marks on so many lives. The church was filled with individuals united by one purpose– to celebrate his life. He taught some people the importance of prayer. He taught some others to not discard burnt cookies because there is value in everything. He showed us by example. He had a vision to share the Gospel with anyone his path crossed. He served others. He sacrificed. He did everything with love. He surely left one beautiful mark.
The time we have we are uncertain, but we know we are to put it to good use. We know we are to give our lives to Christ. We are to have a vision for our lives with God’s purpose in mind. Andy Stanley wrote, “A carefully planted vision, like a seed, grows to take on a life and shape of its own. Long after the sower is gone, the seed continues to grow” (“Visioneering” 114). My question today is are you allowing God to direct your path, so that His purpose for your life is met? He created you to leave a mark– a mark for His kingdom. It is a mark that does not wash away.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” – Colossians 3:12-14 [NIV]